my first ever attempt at a custom pinned post, yippee
I like stuff and things, believe it or not
Aspiring: penis possessor, penis professor, penis progressor
queue doesn't have tags bc I'm lazy but is currently set to 50/day because i accrued a backlog while it was paused so uhh have fun with that lol. it's set to release all between 12-6am EST so as to not bother ppl as much. Release the hoard~
catboys are best boys. catgirls are best girls. cat friends are best kitties. I'm sorry it's just reality, thems the rules
also y'all should follow my queerplatonic friend @caffinevoid they're awesome and i like their random thoughts
lastly, if you haven't experienced the tag #seals you haven't lived: go look it up now i promie it worth it 🥺
Sunray, who will help to put an end to Seawing monarchy
https://artfight.net/character/10271192.sunray
Herding sheep, looking after kids, and playing healer in videogames: every day you're surprised of the sheer innovative genius of how they'll find the most inconvenient goddamn places just outside your reach to get hurt or put themselves in lethal danger.
Isn’t this sheep in real life?
Children in real life also.
It. It literally did. That was literally precisely the point.
I have no idea how the hell I could possibly express myself more clearly.
IT'S LITERALLY RIGHT THERE.
anonymouss-oundRebloggedprokopetzFollowGame that initially appears to be a porn VN starring a Perfectly Generic Male Protagonist, except when you get to the "here's how the sex mechanics work" portion of the intro the girl has a Magnitude 10 klutz moment and accidentally kills him, upon which the viewpoints switches to her and the rest of the game is a reverse investigative procedural about trying to cover up the fake lead's death.6205592
anonymouss-oundReblogged splishsplishimafishadultlikersFollowporksweatse me a mailfortooatemake the attachment
a pic of a snailjumpingjacktrashgive me two gifsof critters in clovernuclearcarrotsthen photoshop them on the CLIIIIIIIFFS OF DOVERlaurasineleI still reference this post today. And yes, when I say I reference it I mean I sing it. 106214,169152,743
anonymouss-oundReblogged uwathebestgirlfefairysFollow5824,68733,339
anonymouss-oundRebloggedbuy-more-orangesFollowFanart of @aroace-madness 10/10 fic I just love itKeep reading163872,128
anonymouss-oundReblogged yaoi-orc-pussyheadspace-hotelFollowthinking again about TvTropes and how it’s genuinely such an amazing resource for learning the mechanics of storytelling, honestly more so than a lot of formally taught literature classes reasons for this: basically TvTropes breaks down stories mechanically, using a perspective that’s not…ABOUT mechanics. Another way I like to put it, is that it’s an inductive, instead of deductive, approach to analyzing storytelling. like in a literature or writing class you’re learning the elements that are part of the basic functioning of a story, so, character, plot, setting, et cetera. You’re learning the things that make a story a story, and why. Like, you learn what setting is, what defines it, and work from there to what makes it effective, and the range of ways it can be effective. here’s the thing, though: everyone has some intuitive understanding of how stories work. if we didn’t, we couldn’t…understand stories. TvTropes’s approach is bottom-up instead of top-down: instead of trying to exhaustively explore the broad, general elements of story, it identifies very small, specific elements, and explores the absolute shit out of how they fit, what they do, where they go, how they work. Every TvTropes article is basically, “Here is a piece of a story that is part of many different stories. You have probably seen it before, but if not, here is a list of stories that use it, where it is, and what it’s doing in those stories. Here are some things it does. Here is why it is functionally different than other, similar story pieces. Here is some background on its origins and how audiences respond to it.” all of this is BRILLIANT for a lot of reasons. one of the major ones is that the site has long lists of media that utilizes any given trope, ranging from classic literature to cartoons to video games to advertisements. the Iliad and Adventure Time ARE different things, but they are MADE OF the same stuff. And being able to study dozens of examples of a trope in action teaches you to see the common thread in what the trope does and why its specific characteristics let it do that I love TvTropes because a great, renowned work of literature and a shitty, derivative YA novel will appear on the same list, because they’re Made Of The Same Stuff. And breaking down that mental barrier between them is good on its own for developing a mechanical understanding of storytelling. But also? I think one of the biggest blessings of TvTropes’s commitment to cataloguing examples of tropes regardless of their “merit” or literary value or whatever…is that we get to see the full range of effectiveness or ineffectiveness of storytelling tools. Like, this is how you see what makes one book good and another book crappy. Tropes are Tools, and when you observe how a master craftsman uses a tool vs. a novice, you can break down not only what the tool is most effective for but how it is best used. In fact? There are trope pages devoted to what happens when storytelling tools just unilaterally fail. e.g. Narm is when creators intend something to be frightening, but audiences find it hilarious instead. On that note, TvTropes is also great in that its analysis of stories is very grounded in authors, audiences, and culture; it’s not solely focused on in-story elements. A lot of the trope pages are categories for audience responses to tropes, or for real-world occurrences that affected the storytelling, or just the human failings that creep into storytelling and affect it, like Early Installment Weirdness. There are categories for censorship-driven storytelling decisions. There are “lineages” of tropes that show how storytelling has changed over time, and how audience responses change as culture changes. Tropes like Draco in Leather Pants or Narm are catalogued because the audience reaction to a story is as much a part of that story—the story of that story?—as the “canon.” like, storytelling is inextricable from context. it’s inextricable from how big the writers’ budget was, and how accepting of homophobia the audience was, and what was acceptable to be shown on film at the time. Tropes beget other tropes, one trope is exchanged for another, they are all linked. A Dead Horse Trope becomes an Undead Horse Trope, and sometimes it was a Dead Unicorn Trope all along. What was this work responding to? And all works are responding to something, whether they know it or not headspace-hotelAn incomplete list of really useful or interesting reads from TvTropes. please note that yes many of these are concepts that exist elsewhere and a few are even taught in fiction writing classes but TvTropes just does an amazing job at displaying the range of things that can be done with them legitimately so much of the terminology I use to talk about storytelling, and even think about it in my own head, i learned about from TvTropes Willing Suspension of Disbelief Watsonian vs. Doylist Trope Tropes, for all the ways tropes are used, deconstructed, subverted, and played with.The Oldest Ones in the Book, which is basically my favorite thing on the entire Internet Punk Punk, for -punk subgenres Sliding Scale of Silliness vs. Seriousness, Sliding Scale of Idealism vs. CynicismThe Weird Al Effect is a fun one Chekhov’s Gun, Chekhov’s Boomerang, Chekhov’s Skill, and further variations Law of Conservation of Detail Law of Conservation of Normality Anthropic Principle Word of God, Death of the Author Sliding Scale of Fourth Wall Hardness Mohs Scale of Science Fiction Hardness Genre Savvy Flashbacks and Chronology breaks down all the ways you can handle chronology in storytelling Show, Don’t Tell is a very good breakdown of what is showing, what is telling, and how both can be used effectively. Lampshade Hanging Noodle Incident is just fun imo Genre Title Grab Bag Fridge Horror Rule of Cool, and also Cool of Rule The Smurfette Principle The Hays Code - not a trope but a very good breakdown of how the Hays Code affected storytelling in film this is just a really short list of examples I encourage people who write or otherwise create stories to browse around on this site it’s so useful thesaltofcarthageInformed Attribute is one of the ones I reference most often as an editor. musicalhellTheory of Narrative Causality is one of my personal favorites, because it's kind of fun when a story acknowledges that things are happening in the story because that's what makes it a good story.Also Applied Phlebotinum, because sometimes you don't need to know how something works, it just does, and that's all that matters for the purposes of the narrative.3331,95342,034
anonymouss-oundRebloggeddocedgFollowfihsiing89372
anonymouss-oundReblogged willowbillyimaconeFollow"Passingly, I think that this might always have been inevitable, that perhaps she had always known it but had wanted to hold on for me, for as long as she could."-Our Wives Under the Sea59272,514
anonymouss-oundRebloggedsmol-ghostsFollowkillroadmutt asked:Ur literally so cool! You’re actually one of the people who got me into Bloodymary! My friend always sends me your comics when he sees them on his instagram feed and it makes my day every time!!Ps: the way you draw the boys is so cute I love them <3smol-ghosts answered:That is so cute wtf 😭❤️❤️❤️ that warms my heart dude I’m happy you and your friends like my work!11183
anonymouss-oundReblogged some-pers0nauramgoldFollowa lot of people assume psychosis hallucinations are super intense all-consuming horror movie shit like the memes about the hat man or always horrible debilitating things that make you dangerous to be aroundbut in my experience 95% of my hallucinations are getting spooked by very clearly hearing someone knocking on my door or calling my name from another room or hearing footsteps walking behind me which are "just" my brain recreating the horror of an abusive childhoodi *have* gotten the "bugs crawling all over me" hallucination once or twice though and yeah that one is exactly as terrible horrible as it sounds AUGHauramgold(not trying to put you on blast specifically, you're just a good example to jump off of)media and pop culture hypes up psychosis a lot as The Worst That Can Happen out of sanism, so even when you try and filter that cultural bias out you still assume it's based on somethingwhen, no, psychosis is actually very simple: it's just hyperactive pattern matching. it's your brain's signal-to-noise ratio being off balance, it's seeing images in random static. it's not always this special uniquely big thing, it's in fact quite mundane a lot of the time.no one is immune to psychosis, it's not purely the realm of the insane. anyone is one bad night of sleep or one bad case of food poisoning or one bad fever away from being just like me on my worst days.and this, indeed, is why solidarity with the insane is so important: you, yes you too, are just one bad day from joining us, and no perceptions of being a "temporarily embarrassed sane person" will save you from the oppression of the psychiatric institution.221,4872,285
anonymouss-oundReblogged alittlemonstersegamascottFollow14711,77841,451
anonymouss-oundReblogged raviolietsuccubusboyfriendFollowyou have permission to pick that 2 year old "abandoned" project back up. it's not mad at you for setting it aside. and maybe time and distance have helped ease or erase the things that made you put it down in the first place.8019,64340,259
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratoradderall-juiceFollowme when they call my name at mcdonals (i am approaching the counter)blogspedewww.mashed.comhere you go siradderall-juicethank you4953,81271,645
anonymouss-oundReblogged ravioliettzikehFollowMore examples of the WORST mansplaining here.useyourblinkerThis might be my favoritelotsofcatsandcheapwineThis is minestockyardsyndrome199103,394104,794
anonymouss-oundReblogged alittlemonster001x456Followthank you seong gi-hun and hwang in-ho111628
anonymouss-oundReblogged raviolieti-am-the-oysterFollow35891,158
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratormookybear12404FollowI feel like the first class you played in DND tells a lot about youReblog and put in the tags what your first class was#sorcerer for pathfinder#bard & cleric for d&d43327,75918,478
anonymouss-oundReblogged big-condiments-officialtroutreznorhttps://blinkies.cafe infestuousthis post really attracted the lamest people in the fucking world 10,31214,541
anonymouss-oundReblogged catboybiologisttumblerculosisFollowI’ve been obsessed with this tiktok for days nowcoffeedcaitPerson: "Hello sir." he pets the frog with one finger.Person: "Have a good day. Actually wait a minute. You missed a bug, but I got you home boy. Hold on." he picks a bug up and throws it next to the frog.Frog: turns around and eats the bug.Person: "OHHHHH-" sings high pitched and angelic like he witnessed a miracle. 9154,31863,323
anonymouss-oundReblogged celestialgluttonymisscrazyfangirl321FollowBeing an adult will have you unironically craving a vegetable misscrazyfangirl321Being an adult will have you unironically sad about a parasite outbreak in fresh vegetables. 11617,95726,433
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratorkosmogrlFollowoooh I get it it’s always gonna be because of the environment I grew up in aceofpansit’s because of the cursepenaeus-monodon@aceofpans you're like famousaceofpansthis post had notes before I reblogged it1212,13021,168
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratorenki2Followhylianengineer@copperbadge this seems up your alleycopperbadgeIf the system ain't broke, don't fix it, I guess! Accounting may not be the oldest profession, but someone had to keep the books for them. I mean, in theory I know that Excel is based on the structure of earlier accounting technology that's been around for hundreds of years -- what do we think we did to track commerce before computers? -- but it still kind of blows my mind to, for example, look at my ancestor's journal from a whaling voyage in 1770 and see spreadsheets in the back. charaznablespeteevee416,34124,071
anonymouss-oundReblogged alittlemonsterdestiel-news-channelFollow[Image ID: The Destiel confession meme edited so that Dean answers 'JK Rowling posted upskirt photos of a woman on Twitter' to Cas 'I love you'. /End ID]No one doing this should be allowed to call themselves a feminist.JK Rowling deadnamed and posted 'upskirt' photo of trans woman on XThe wealthy author escalated a social media spat that resulted in posting a photo from a 2023 event at the Institute of Economic Affairs in SnopessolarishashernoseinabookLet's not beat around the bush: Children's author JK Rowling sexually harassed someone. In some jurisdictions, this would count as sexual abuse. JK Rowling has committed a sex crime against a woman and fell back on the old rape apologist standby of "she was asking for it". I hope your nostalgia is worth it #damn watch this not get prosecuted at all because the uk courts love terfs1217,0777,659
anonymouss-oundReblogged celestialgluttonychillyfeetsteakFollowa few doors down from me my neighbors have a squirrel bar nailed to the tree in front of the sidewalk, not exactly this but something like this:it's been there for years and they never "stock" it so it's just sitting there. anyway, i thought it would be cute to make a little squirrel out of sculpey and leave it on one of the stools in the middle of the night. i also made a little sculpey beer bottle with its own label. it lasted exactly one day and now it is gone. it didn't fall off, i stuck it on with tape. what do you think happened to it? your most fantastical and wrong answers only, please chillyfeetsteakHUGE NEWS HUGE UPDATEsquirrel REAPPEARED today... NOW PAINTEDchillyfeetsteaki wanted to provide another update because there has been more activity at the nut bara few weeks ago i sculpted a new patron: and put him in the bar. the next day he was gone. a couple weeks later he reappeared painted... but with ANOTHER new guest: a 3D printed squirrel based on the first one i sculpted (with a bottle!) :)unyieldingsilence5318,48822,554
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratortabloidsoresFollowTwo dudes in my group chat have been playing league & slowly but surely have shifted from saying "wanna play league of legends" to "wanna play some geego legends". At this point their average post is just @ing the other and going "geegogagand?" and I feel insane tabloidsoresWhat is going on159771,511
anonymouss-oundReblogged alittlemonsterdemonprincexFollowstatements like "It's wrong to masturbate about a person without their consent" and "It's wrong to do something that quietly arouses you while you are in public even if no one can see it" show that a person's understanding of morality basically involves magical thinking. like I wrote this post on the toilet. That's not the same thing as me literally shitting on youdemonprincexthe only valid person in the replies like at all 1,21327,20550,996
anonymouss-oundReblogged catboybiologisthacashFollowsomeone at the marketing department had a little too much fun with thisvillainessbiana challenger5817,87924,154
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratormilk5-deactivated20260704The science behind THC + alcohol as a combination is literally soo interesting because it basically causes the crimson red duckling in your body to confront the serpent in the bronze vessel of your heart. Basically you feel good because the duckling is able to eat the harmonious seeds stored within the vessel and transfer these positive energies into your body. You can have bad highs when this happens if the duckling awakens the serpent and it bites the duckling. The interesting part is when you ingest alcohol after THC because it floods the vessel and causes the serpent to fall into a deep sleep. The duckling never gets attacked by the serpent when this happens because it is unconscious and the duckling is actually able to get fat from the harmonious seed, which causes an enjoyable sensation.19840,53846,296
anonymouss-oundReblogged punkitt-is-herebeaftFollowthe phrase "but i didn't mean to!" in the context of causing harm is kind of redundant to me, because almost nobody means to cause harm. most of us just want to do the right thing. and i don't mean that in a wishy-washy "oh, we're all good deep down" way, i mean that even people who regularly do the most heinous shit imaginable will have a way of justifying it to themselves. the world is not populated by hollywood sadists and psychopaths.beaftactually i have been thinking about this some more and i want to add on to it:abuse in caregiving professions (like teaching or nursing) is not solely a result of power dynamics. it's also because people who go into those professions often have a idea of themselves as Good People, and are consequently incapable of recognising or acknowledging when they've hurt someone else. instead, they mentally put 'people who have inconvenienced me' into the Bad People box so they can freely abuse them while maintaining their moral high ground.i read ross greene a lot when i was working with "difficult" or "behaviourally challenged" children. his refrain is "kids do well if they can" - meaning, in short, that most kids act out only when the demands of a situation exceed their capabilities. punishing them for this is not only cruel but also completely pointless, because they also don't want to be doing what they are doing. a teacher who believes that there are two categories of people - Good People who Mean Well, and Bad People who Cause Problems on Purpose - is not going to see it that way. they're gonna put themselves in the first category, and the misbehaving kid in the second category. and once they have effectively depersoned the child and placed themselves on a pedestal, the world becomes simple again. because abuse is something that only Bad People do.403,5205,365
anonymouss-oundReblogged alittlemonstergayturiansFollowasgardian-vikingList of People who could use this:-Trans women (cosplayers and non-cosplayers)- Cis Women who feel too shy to actually show off their chest but still want to pull this off- Cis women with small chests who also want to be true the characters.- Pretty much any dude who wants to cosplay as a female character- Anyone who wants to piss off Travisavocados26Reblog to piss off Travis and support trans women + male cosplayers 426260,638245,369
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anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratorcindarslairFollowIn Avatar fics the seems to be a trend where Toph put her hand on peoples face's (usually Zuko's?) to see them and I can't help but imagine that if she wanted to see someone's face she would get them to lie in the dirt (or trip them into it) face first then put her hands on the ground to let earth sense see for hermuffinlanceThis combines beautifully with the very real world fact that blind people DO NOT want to see more of the "blind people touching other people's faces" trope in media So someone offers to let Toph touch their faceBut being Toph, she is sick of merely explaining, again, that Blind People Don't Want To Paw Your Greasy FaceSo she just makes them eat dirt instead"Thanks, I got a great look."muffinlanceTags by @avaraydrake#( #prev: #You going to explain colors to me next? Because can show you brown #) #toph: *earthbends their face into some rock* #sokka: that's gray actually #toph: *earthbends sokka into the same rock*You see my vision109692,364
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratorincendaveryFollowDONT ask why corvid isnt wearing a shirt bc the answer is embarrassing. (i forgor to draw it)51,9013,692
anonymouss-oundRebloggedanonbeadrawsFollowtodays warm up: The Abbey is full of ghosts again and it couldn't be a happier place62,2473,718
anonymouss-oundReblogged alittlemonsterwarren-keplers-funk-bandFollowattack for @wattse (wattse)15841,278
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratorsabertoothwalrusFollowI have a new dungeon meshi au where everything is the same except for thissabertoothwalrusthis is how I know yall weren’t reblogging the companion to this post 🙄296,45816,474
anonymouss-oundRebloggedfishbonesartFollowAvatar God AU (Southern Gods)I know I've literally got another au in the works already but i don't care man I love mythology and now they're gods >:)))))Some info!Katara and Sokka's face markings are based on the Painted Lady and Warrior makeup (respectively)-- on top of giving Sokka some winged eyeliner to resemble a wolf's markings (as the master of wolves), and a semi-circle on Katara's forehead as a symbol of equality (as the goddess of justice).Gods don't technically "die" in this AU-- it doesn't happen often, but when it does, they usually become one with their domain. When Gyatso died, as the god of the wind, he turned into the wind and could only communicate through wind chimes (small signs/yes/no-- he can't communicate complex thoughts). When Kya died, she turned into the starry sky. Hakoda, grieving his wife, would often study her form in the sky and learned to use the patterns of her stars to navigate, which made him become god of navigators.When Kya died, people started praying to Sokka and Katara for matters of family and home-- it's not actually their domain, but they gratefully accept the duties that come with taking over for their mother.Katara's necklace has sharp points in this to relate to her mother's star domain.Katara's cloak is a sealskin (as the matron of sealife)Yes, Sokka's leg is still hurt in this (still trying to figure out the story behind that, but I love when characters get permanent injuries in media and I'm KEEPING IT) he has a cane-- doesn't always need to use it but he has it!Sokka's cloak is a polar bear dog's hide (as the god of hunting)Next93121,474
anonymouss-oundRebloggedfishbonesartFollowAvatar God AU (Nomad)Aang >:)Info!
Had a LOT of fun combining Air Nomad outfit elements with a more typical "travel" outfit. Super warm colour palettes of course!
Aang is the god of balance, travelers, and hospitality. He's a bit of a free spirit and a lot of the more serious gods find him a bit annoying (Sokka.)
People often pray to Aang when they have to go on long journeys, or invoke his name when they need to stop to rest.
It's a well-known fact that the god of travelers has a habit of wandering around incognito-- he just does it because he likes interacting with people without being recognized. In doing so, however, he accidentally started to enforce his hospitality domain, as mortals became terrified of accidentally offending him if he were to show up at their door.
He loves to follow Sokka around on hunts (he gets to explore dangerous areas)-- Sokka hates when Aang follows him because he almost always ends up losing his catch.
Katara and Aang's Justice and Balance domains mean that they often are called upon together by mortals. Katara, to enact a fitting punishment upon perpetrators. And Aang, to provide reparations to victims. It's found to be very fitting that they ended up becoming a couple.Previous // NextBeginning134542,586
anonymouss-oundRebloggedfishbonesartFollowAvatar God AU (Toph)This one's really funToph is a very interesting one.She's the Goddess of Victory and the Truth, amongst other things. She's one of the most-revered gods out there, due to how powerful a domain she holds. Athletes, soldiers, and leaders alike all pray to her very often.Her blindness is not at all seen as an issue by mortals-- actually, due to her blindness, mortals tend to be much kinder to disabled folk. It's seen as sacrilegious to forbid someone from participating in sports, contest, or even war on the basis of their perceived abilities. It's seen almost as if you're saying that Toph wouldn't be able to do that.She's also the patron of innovation. She's the first form of Metalbending, and inventors/tinkerers will often pray to both her and Sokka (god of wisdom) when they go to create something new.The Blind Bandit is an enigma.No one really knows what she is-- she might be the goddess of trickery? And lies? but she's the only goddess to have no temples, to never ask for offerings or prayers, and she doesn't really... act like a goddess. Really, she's more of a cryptid than a goddess- she definitely isn't human, considering she's been hanging around for like 300 years... but yeah no one really knows what she's up to.Yes the wolf she's riding on is Sokka- he isn't too happy about it but he has a soft spot for Toph.Aang and The Blind Bandit meet each other pretty often on the road-- he's normally the epitome of "good deeds" but she's a really bad influence on him (some think that he just can't say no to someone that shares his sense of style)Previous // NextFirst589340
anonymouss-oundReblogged qqchurchcreekfiendFollowwhat if I never got a fucking migraine ever againcreekfiendWHAT IF NOBODY ON EARTH EVER GOT A MIGRAINE EVER AGAIN!!!!24,5425,494
anonymouss-oundReblogged qqchurchcharbottanFollowis anybody gonna pet the gentle freak…….the gentle freak is gonna grow sad and anxious if nobody pets it……is nobody gonna pet the freak……nobody?…..nobody pet the gentle freak?…..3324,82127,778
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratorsilkysongFollowfather please. 3716,46534,397
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratorwayfire-officialFollowI slightly remember that the ice bucket challenge was supposed to raise awareness for something, but I can't remember what it was for, which probably speak volumes about its effectiveness in raising awareness for itverilog-officialiirc it was breast cancer? but yeah, a viral trend doesn't mean anything unless the thing itself points towards the thing you're raising awareness for.wayfire-officialI'm doing the joking my penor challenge, where you gotta jork your penar to raise awareness about peens that haven't been jorked recently 1911
anonymouss-oundReblogged alittlemonsterliarsbladeFollowthere's this weird thing people fall into online a lot, where people assume that if the [perceived-to-be-inferior] version of [activity] is discouraged then people will, naturally, do [perceived-to-be-superior] version of [activity] instead. When really it's just as (or more) likely that if [perceived-to-be-inferior] version of [activity] is discouraged people just won't do it at all.liarsbladeaudiobook listeners are not necessarily people who would otherwise do a lot of traditional reading if audiobooks did not exist, many are people who simply would experience zero books. Booktok romance readers would not necessarily be reading the classics if booktok did not exist, many of them would simply not read. Fanfiction writers would not necessarily be novelists if fanfic wasn't an option, many would just be people who didn't write. You know?483,8445,922
anonymouss-oundReblogged netheratorprismitFollowto any nonbinary people reading this, never forget:you can collect SOUL by striking enemies. once enough SOUL is collected, you can hold B to focus SOUL and regain health.thesmallestfishto any women reading this, never forget:you can collect SILK by striking enemies. once enough SILK is collected, you can hold B to bind SILK and regain health.firewoman-philto any Invincible, Fearless, Sensual, Mysterious, Enchanting, Vigorous, Diligent, Overwhelming, Gorgeous, Passionate, Terrifying, Beautiful, Powerful men reading this, never forget: Precept One: 'Always Win Your Battles'. Losing a battle earns you nothing and teaches you nothing. Win your battles, or don't engage in them at all!Precept Two: 'Never Let Them Laugh at You'. Fools laugh at everything, even at their superiors. But beware, laughter isn't harmless! Laughter spreads like a disease, and soon everyone is laughing at you. You need to strike at the source of this perverse merriment quickly to stop it from spreading.Precept Three: 'Always Be Rested'. Fighting and adventuring take their toll on your body. When you rest, your body strengthens and repairs itself. The longer you rest, the stronger you become.Precept Four: 'Forget Your Past'. The past is painful, and thinking about your past can only bring you misery. Think about something else instead, such as the future, or some food.Precept Five: 'Strength Beats Strength'. Is your opponent strong? No matter! Simply overcome their strength with even more strength, and they'll soon be defeated.Precept Six: 'Choose Your Own Fate'. Our elders teach that our fate is chosen for us before we are even born. I disagree.Precept Seven: 'Mourn Not the Dead'. When we die, do things get better for us or worse? There's no way to tell, so we shouldn't bother mourning. Or celebrating for that matter.Precept Eight: 'Travel Alone'. You can rely on nobody, and nobody will always be loyal. Therefore, nobody should be your constant companion.Precept Nine: 'Keep Your Home Tidy'. Your home is where you keep your most prized possession - yourself. Therefore, you should make an effort to keep it nice and clean.Precept Ten: 'Keep Your Weapon Sharp'. I make sure that my weapon, 'Life Ender', is kept well-sharpened at all times. This makes it much easier to cut things.Precept Eleven: 'Mothers Will Always Betray You'. This Precept explains itself.Precept Twelve: 'Keep Your Cloak Dry'. If your cloak gets wet, dry it as soon as you can. Wearing wet cloaks is unpleasant, and can lead to illness.Precept Thirteen: 'Never Be Afraid'. Fear can only hold you back. Facing your fears can be a tremendous effort. Therefore, you should just not be afraid in the first place.Precept Fourteen: 'Respect Your Superiors'. If someone is your superior in strength or intellect or both, you need to show them your respect. Don't ignore them or laugh at them.Precept Fifteen: 'One Foe, One Blow'. You should only use a single blow to defeat an enemy. Any more is a waste. Also, by counting your blows as you fight, you'll know how many foes you've defeated.Precept Sixteen: 'Don't Hesitate'. Once you've made a decision, carry it out and don't look back. You'll achieve much more this way.Precept Seventeen: 'Believe In Your Strength'. Others may doubt you, but there's someone you can always trust. Yourself. Make sure to believe in your own strength, and you will never falter.Precept Eighteen: 'Seek Truth in the Darkness'. This Precept also explains itself.Precept Nineteen: 'If You Try, Succeed'. If you're going to attempt something, make sure you achieve it. If you do not succeed, then you have actually failed! Avoid this at all costs.Precept Twenty: 'Speak Only the Truth'. When speaking to someone, it is courteous and also efficient to speak truthfully. Beware though that speaking truthfully may make you enemies. This is something you'll have to bear.Precept Twenty-One: 'Be Aware of Your Surroundings'. Don't just walk along staring at the ground! You need to look up every so often, to make sure nothing takes you by surprise.Precept Twenty-Two: 'Abandon the Nest'. As soon as I could, I left my birthplace and made my way out into the world. Do not linger in the nest. There is nothing for you there.Precept Twenty-Three: 'Identify the Foe's Weak Point'. Every foe you encounter has a weak point, such as a crack in their shell or being asleep. You must constantly be alert and scrutinising your enemy to detect their weakness!Precept Twenty-Four: 'Strike the Foe's Weak Point'. Once you have identified your foe's weak point as per the previous Precept, strike it. This will instantly destroy them.Precept Twenty-Five: 'Protect Your Own Weak Point'. Be aware that your foe will try to identify your weak point, so you must protect it. The best protection? Never having a weak point in the first place.Precept Twenty-Six: 'Don't Trust Your Reflection'. When peering at certain shining surfaces, you may see a copy of your own face. The face will mimic your movements and seems similar to your own, but I don't think it can be trusted.Precept Twenty-Seven: 'Eat As Much As You Can'. When having a meal, eat as much as you possibly can. This gives you extra energy, and means you can eat less frequently.Precept Twenty-Eight: 'Don't Peer Into the Darkness'. If you peer into the darkness and can't see anything for too long, your mind will start to linger over old memories. Memories are to be avoided, as per Precept Four.Precept Twenty-Nine: 'Develop Your Sense of Direction'. It's easy to get lost when travelling through winding, twisting caverns. Having a good sense of direction is like having a magical map inside of your head. Very useful.Precept Thirty: 'Never Accept a Promise'. Spurn the promises of others, as they are always broken. Promises of love or betrothal are to be avoided especially.Precept Thirty-One: 'Disease Lives Inside of Dirt'. You'll get sick if you spend too much time in filthy places. If you are staying in someone else's home, demand the highest level of cleanliness from your host.Precept Thirty-Two: 'Names Have Power'. Names have power, and so to name something is to grant it power. I myself named my nail 'Life-Ender'. Do not steal the name I came up with! Invent your own!Precept Thirty-Three: 'Show the Enemy No Respect'. Being gallant to your enemies is no virtue! If someone opposes you, they don't deserve respect or kindness or mercy.Precept Thirty-Four: 'Don't Eat Immediately Before Sleeping'. This can cause restlessness and indigestion. It's just common sense.Precept Thirty-Five: 'Up is Up, Down is Down'. If you fall over in the darkness, it can be easy to lose your bearing and forget which way is up. Keep this Precept in mind!Precept Thirty-Six: 'Eggshells are brittle'. Once again, this Precept explains itself.Precept Thirty-Seven: 'Borrow, But Do Not Lend'. If you lend and are repaid, you gain nothing. If you borrow but do not repay, you gain everything.Precept Thirty-Eight: 'Beware the Mysterious Force'. A mysterious force bears down on us from above, pushing us downwards. If you spend too long in the air, the force will crush you against the ground and destroy you. Beware!Precept Thirty-Nine: 'Eat Quickly and Drink Slowly'. Your body is a delicate thing and you must fuel it with great deliberation. Food must go in as fast as possible, but fluids at a slower rate.Precept Forty: 'Obey No Law But Your Own'. Laws written by others may inconvenience you or be a burden. Let your own desires be the only law.Precept Forty-One: 'Learn to Detect Lies'. When others speak, they usually lie. Scrutinize and question them relentlessly until they reveal their deceit.Precept Forty-Two: 'Spend Geo When You Have It'. Some will cling onto their Geo, even taking it into the dirt with them when they die. It is better to spend it when you can, so you can enjoy various things in life.Precept Forty-Three: 'Never Forgive'. If someone asks forgiveness of you, for instance a brother of yours, always deny it. That brother, or whoever it is, doesn't deserve such a thing.Precept Forty-Four: 'You Can Not Breathe Water'. Water is refreshing, but if you try to breathe it you are in for a nasty shock.Precept Forty-Five: 'One Thing Is Not Another'. This one should be obvious, but I've had others try to argue that one thing, which is clearly what it is and not something else, is actually some other thing, which it isn't. Stay on your guard!Precept Forty-Six: 'The World is Smaller Than You Think'. When young, you tend to think that the world is vast, huge, gigantic. It's only natural. Unfortunately, it's actually quite a lot smaller than that. I can say this, now having traveled everywhere in the land.Precept Forty-Seven: 'Make Your Own Weapon'. Only you know exactly what is needed in your weapon. I myself fashioned 'Life Ender' from shellwood at a young age. It has never failed me. Nor I it.Precept Forty-Eight: 'Be Careful With Fire'. Fire is a type of hot spirit that dances about recklessly. It can warm you and provide light, but it will also singe your shell if it gets too close.Precept Forty-Nine: 'Statues are Meaningless'. Do not honor them! No one has ever made a statue of you or I, so why should we pay them any attention?Precept Fifty: 'Don't Linger on Mysteries'. Some things in this world appear to us as puzzles. Or enigmas. If the meaning behind something is not immediately evident though, don't waste any time thinking about it. Just move on.Precept Fifty-One: 'Nothing is Harmless'. Given the chance, everything in this world will hurt you. Friends, foes, monsters, uneven paths. Be suspicious of them all.Precept Fifty-Two: 'Beware the Jealousy of Fathers'. Fathers believe that because they created us we must serve them and never exceed their capabilities. If you wish to forge your own path, you must vanquish your father. Or simply abandon him.Precept Fifty-Three: 'Do Not Steal the Desires of Others'. Every creature keeps their desires locked up inside of themselves. If you catch a glimpse of another's desires, resist the urge to claim them as your own. It will not lead you to happiness.Precept Fifty-Four: 'If You Lock Something Away, Keep the Key'. Nothing should be locked away for ever, so hold onto your keys. You will eventually return and unlock everything you hid away.Precept Fifty-Five: 'Bow to No-one'. There are those in this world who would impose their will on others. They claim ownership over your food, your land, your body, and even your thoughts! They have done nothing to earn these things. Never bow to them, and make sure to disobey their commands.Precept Fifty-Six: 'Do Not Dream'. Dreams are dangerous things. Strange ideas, not your own, can worm their way into your mind. But if you resist those ideas, sickness will wrack your body! Best not to dream at all, like me.Precept Fifty-Seven: 'Obey All Precepts'. Most importantly, you must commit all of these Precepts to memory and obey them all unfailingly. Including this one! Hmm. Have you truly listened to everything I've said? Let's start again and repeat the 'Fifty-Seven Precepts of Men'thesmallestfish4917,06819,889
anonymouss-oundReblogged alittlemonsterwinonaparadiseFollowi see a curved penis and i want to fix that shit. it's not that it's gross i just bet an hour in a bench vice would make that shit shoot straight. i wanna comically spin the handle and wrench it tight with the skill of a shop teacher that's been doing this for years. safety goggles on. heavy duty gloves. op! be careful of the clenching back there. that's how Ms. Paradise lost a pinky in college.winonaparadiseI suppose this exposes my ignorance and inexperience. I suggest we normalize the use of the penis vice so that we can curve and straighten cocks to our own unique tastes. They can be 3D printed with an aposable skeleton so that they can be curved. I have included a mockup down below.transhumanisticpanspermiaop i regret to inform you that the curve is so inherent that it persists even when you flip it inside out, turn it into a vagina, and stick a ramrod straight dilator into it for 30 minutes 4 times per day for several months.(they don't usually give you an MRI 4 months after bottom surgery, i just happened to need one for unrelated reasons)winonaparadisegirl why is your pussy trying to take me on the road less traveled. fucking that thing i hear google maps say "exit left." trying to hit your spot but your pussy said that's not part of the guided tour. your shit is so twisted the people's joker took it to her doctor saying "like this please." I KNOW she WILL be comin around the mountain when she comes! i always wanted a girl who turned heads, but this is ridiculous!!!126,73011,018
