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It won't be long now

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=D

wtf what are you doing why are you invading your brothers they helped you wtf

bro.. you are literally an atlantic away from poland...

well poland is committing sodomy so it's only righteous that they get wardec'd

but do they wear mixed-fabric garments?

>ugh those pesky romans who... *checks notes* got invaded by the dindu nuffin germanics
unironically this

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just fixing herstory right?
Sell Danzig to Prussia once they are done.
but thats it for today. have to mow the lawn

why is pole5bro playing eu4

the pole would break his nails

president's log, the 14th of february in the year 7 DTE ((early)dystopian tranny era, (or 1782))
prussia has accepted our offer to enter into a military alliance

>unbenannt.jpg
high doubts of that being pole5bro

that's not pole5fag
pole5fag would be asking us what he should do half of the time

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what went wrong

trying to peek over the alps

they were out of cash to raise armies against purrsia then they got raped by covid while germs reinvaded the po

oh sorry wrong sub i meant johan overbuffed pagans and nerfed chalcedonianism

hhahahahhahahahahah
god that term sounds so gay when i imagine it being pronounced (nawm de ploooooom)

it's actually pronounced nom de plumeh, you fsl

wondering if i should give up on eu5 and return to ck3 after a very long hiatus of not playing historical gsg
but then again there's also age of history which some other anon brought up, i could experiment with that
hmm... gilded destiny...
>aquila interactive
>youtube channel
>working on at least 3 other projects
fucking shitters
>release date: 2026
... not with all this shit distracting you

learning eu4 is so fucking boring and retarded i've decided to limit myself to only playing eu4 ever until i finally learn it to be decent.
i love paracuck games but learning them is the worst fucking experience in gaming, you get fisted constantly.

it is dumb no matter how trvd you think you are

>i love paracuck games
yikes

eu4 is like the easiest of these games to learn other than maybe ck2/3 tho?
you can just ask questions here, what do you struggle with? trade? most mechanics you leanr in the sense that you just go "dont do this"

eu4 used to be the easiest of these games to learn until they've added a shitload of buttons that trade one type of mana for another (most of which you have to click in 1444 in the correct order)
i can certainly understand why a new player would be overwhelmed with the whole estate privilege screen, especially since eu4 ui is so fucking shit
my suggestion is to just watch a later arumba playthrough. he's an unrepentant blobber but he's got the mechanics on lockdown

desu i'm not yet struggling with any specific mechanics, i've got only like 10 hours behind me so everything is hard. i'm getting assraped in any war i get into, but i'm getting the hang of it slowly. i've only played hoi darkest hour and 4 and ck2/3 before. thanks though, i will ask when i get into any specific issues.
i remember arumba actually, i think i watched him for a bit. i guess i'll return to his vids then.

my suggestion would b to learn as u go bcuz learning is part of the fun
if ur unsure u can ask a question here

you would expect him to treat you like a retarded baby that doesn't know the basics of 4chan? weird

>the basics of 4chan
arch.b4k.dev isn't even part of the website dumbass

why is the pope orange?

because he is an ancestor of trump

that's right, neither is my router, but i still had to learn to reset my ippie to get around the janitorial tyranny
same thing with archives, all the best posts always get deleted

>all the best posts always get deleted
spoken like a pedo

yes, i do pirate paradox games. how did you know?

>i still had to learn to reset my ippie
lol
you mean you wasted time figuring it out without having a based bro on cuckchan tell you about it, nor some quick google search? hahahahahahaaahahah

no, i figured it all on my own
i'm something of a sherlock holmes

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something of a fibber too

you can't just post a germany when it's willy wagglin time

is this reddish thing over hungary poland? if yes, then fair enough

that's galicia lodomeria

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>you can't just post a germany when it's willy wagglin time
mandatory best-groBgermania postin' time

welcome back ban-evader

what's the most /gsg/coded bible verses?

render unto kaiser the things that are keiser's

i'm thinking of making a 1337 scenario for age of history 3 that is based on eu5 and then playing it
the provinces might be too big compared to eu5's though, so being 100% accurate to it is probably impossible

>"What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?" (Mark 8:36)
mindless blobbers btfo

um i don't think they have a kaiser in the 1st century bro

yeah he died in 44 ante christum

>polish timezone
based

also known as the evropean time zone (also encompasses libya, sudan, rhodesia and zuidafrikums)

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>>polish timezone

i decline my friends' invitations because i want to play gsg alone

>westernmost part of central european standard time zone
>galicia
>westernmost part of central european standard time zone
>also galicia
funny

>A = C
>A = C as well
>funny
...okay?

>westernmost part of central european standard time zone
>germany
>easternmost part of central european standard time zone
>also germany
what coulda bene

wait, i meant to type easternmost for the 2nd one
because in both cases it's galicia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galicia_(Spain)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galicia_(Eastern_Europe)

26
The sad reality is that all Paradox games are blobbing games. Not a single gsg accurately simulates emergent historical changes. CK2 did well with event spawned levies for new empires and spreading new cultures but that wasn´t enough to prevent the inevitable blobbing.

when you want historical borders, you can just live in the now

idk about that, though if you are trans, i heard that victoria 2 will be right up your alley

>memegame2 is for trannies
h'woah, who woulda' known...

but he said vicky 2 was enjoyed by trannies, not memegame 2

im greek sigma

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62
63
I didn´t mean that gsgs should have exact historical outcomes. But rather typical historical fragmentation and collapse of empires that lead to the creation of new nations. There should be a time of consolidation and then a time of collapse. The second part always falls short.

but the early modern period was one of consolidation

Yes. But the games can never portray something like the Ottoman ascension and decline. In short, you can´t have a country dominate for 300 years and then decline for 100 years. Never happens. The Ottomans either get stopped early or they become unstoppable.

you cant design civil wars, secessions, disloyal governors or anything without making the game anti-fun at a certain point

you say that but my ck2/3 campaigns always get cooked once i have to play one bad heir

that's one of the joys of crusader kings
witnessing the cycle of rise and fall
the chaos

therefore ck3 >>>>> all other gsgs

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Deaths are still aplenty, we're still suffering, a debate needed to be had... And this is what they came up with. What we need is God.

but ck3 is not even better than ck2

i... might be able to agree with that
i'm not sure where eu5 stands in comparison to ck3
if one isn't the best, then sure, the other is

for me, it's liqqy

so pole5fag, you chose the "fill in the holes" choice? because it looks like your estates are still in positive satisfaction

green* satisfaction

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I lowered their taxes in preperation for the parliment and i didn't end up giving out the privelage because I realised last second that it's very close and i need their support.
hehe, i didn't tell u cuz it was a blunder on my part, showing that I'll give it out but then not doing so... I thought I'll just give it out in 2 more posts and that'll be that, whoops :o

Also another thing I didn't notify you of because I forgot, here's a little scheme I've come up with... I noticed that assimilating these people would take a long time, espeically since they would need to be converted also... BUT... if we're to "move" them to somewhere more suitable, where we have more control... they might just assimilate themselves...

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I love when the nobility gives me this one, Poland has and always had exactly ZERO naval tradition, it's actually free

>mieszczanstwo

>>>/sp/156504242

top kek, can someone make the /gsg/ version of this? doesn't matter which you wanna ridicule be it blobbers or people who buy paradox games maybe

i don't get it

the guy who used to make that kind of greentext ("memegame2") already retired earlier this year, so there's that

that guy made the waggle pastae he will never retire

are you talking about the guy who made those ai images of the rgo skydaddy

i'm pretty sure those are 3 different shitposters.

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sportschuddery making its way into this general has been a disaster for gsg culture
anyone with me on this?
>mieszczanstwo
what's funny/amusing about this? in your own words

New development, muscow hates Poland just like IRL, believable worlds.

The nobility have decided to stop supporting us it seems. We can panic press either the +10 or +12 buttons, but there is no way we're passing another law or raising taxes with these. A very uneventful and lame parliment this time, barely got anything done.

always collect as much serfdom as you can, its hard to stack u nless you want to megabuff the nobles which you shouldnt want and free subjects is just badge

in my own words?
it's a long word that seems ridiculous at a glance but probably makes sense in polish (but could be written way more elegantly in cyrillic)
it's apparently also just a translation of burghers which begs the question what the fuck was paradox thinking translating that pop type specifically for poland where it doesn't differ at all from all of the other european burgers

*ahem*
.
.
RECHTSSCHUTZVERSICHERUNGSGESELLSCHAFTEN

johan is autistic so unlike something such as, say, ck3, you're going to find terms that are lyk soooo unique and accurate

that's jjust multiple words doe
RECHTS SCHUTZ VERSICHER UNGSGESELL SCHAFTEN

>UNGSGESELL
>UN/gsg/ESELL

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Serfdom is already nearly at almost 70, I would benefit from boosting it but not enough to lose the 5 prestige it would take to boost it, IMO.
>but could be written way more elegantly in cyrillic
how is spelling something in poverty runes "more ellegant"?
here's an event just for you. they give us -5% support, hanging on by a thread.

Ghost ship, we're not touching that one, it was clearly abandoned for a reason.

>poverty runes
look, just because modern greece is a shithole doesn't mean you can call the roman empire poor

unc gsg wat nou

pięćdziesięciogroszówka

why are you type so much what doesn´t need to be typed? 70 5

i think tomorrow comes 1.3

i wonder if complicated polish writing was the catholic church's attempt at hindering illiterate polish ubermensch from complete cultural and military domination

that does make sense
keep in mind the illiterate czech ubermenschen fought a war against the rest of europe and almost won
must have given the church quite a scare

^trve

>i think tomorrow comes 1.3
what did he mean by this

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TURN BACK
NO FUCK OFF WE'RE FULL
TURN BACK AND DON'T COME BACK
See, we needed that prestige for something.
also, we're doing the thing i said we will do earlier.

eu5 1.3 The patch introduces new mechanics, quality-of-life improvements, performance optimizations, and content such as new bureaucracies and government reforms.

a game patch that reads like gubmint promises kek

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Now that we're
>i wonder if complicated polish writing was the catholic church's attempt at hindering illiterate polish ubermensch from complete cultural and military domination
I have yet to hear 1 pole complain about polish spelling, it just works.

here's what's going to happen, sickness is almsot gone fron the country, what the population now needs is Jesus. let's stop blaming the germans and start turning to the Lord, this way society may recover at least a little bit. (+2 stability?)

i've yet to hear one armenian complain about the genocide (i never spoke to any armenians)

never full quotes my post ever again

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>eu5 1.3
... what? i literally have a pirated version of 1.3.4 running
why do you not have access to one?

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>i've yet to hear one armenian complain about the genocide (i never spoke to any armenians)
system of a dawn came back together just to cry about kharabakh, remember that?

Nobility were indeed needed for this one, we barely made it but with their help we pulled it off.

no, i don't remember that

i think that renaissance man on a white horse cover art looks so superficial, soulles and quite possibly gay
anyone with me on this?

he certainly looks better than the powdered wig and panty hose fags from later on in history, to say the least

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>no, i don't remember that
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqmknZNg1yw [Embed]
now u remember

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Oh you thought it was over? Our lovely vassal has decided to have ANOTHER rebelion. This one isn't supported by foreigners so it should be easy, but I have no way of telling a vassal not to participate in a war, so they will all get armies, march around and spread pestilince. Great!
There's only one thing we can realistically do in this situation...

i remember pooping in my panties when victoria 3 released

i remember flying my roflcopter during that week, flying around vst and gsg

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>>peace deal is signed
yeah just like when they got rid of all their nukes in that other peace deal :)

Sorry i had to fast forward a month, i'm cooking a suprise for you guys :)
Here's what we've all been waiting for, the clensing of heresy on our border. We might not be fond of the teutons but their mission wasn't terrible, just the way they handled it. We'll do God's work and thank him for sparing our King and relenting in the pestilence! Amen!

Also they broke their allience with Kyiv so i'm scared they'll get another one and the CB expries next year, chop chop

dedicating this much time and effort into writing to a grand total of 0 reader is... admirable

>enemies leader
take her pussy

pole

prestige is (almost) entirely worthless except as additional antagonism decay, always feel free to throw it away

not him, but i could've sworn it had numerous uses

it does but none of them matter, nobody cares about 1 percent market attraction and whatever else slop it does

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> a grand total of 0 reader
and yet you noticed and replied to my post, curious
>take her
if that was a mechanic i absolutely would, if the opportunity comes up i'll let you know
>prestige
it gives you market advantage which is not nothing, i do agree it's not super strong but i wouldn't say it's worthless.

pictured: cabinet member having this happen to him AGAIN, might get rid of him and wait for my son to come of age in 5 years, as good of a time as any I suppose.
middle: the lepper colony that is our army, they cought the plague and never recovered. keeping them near the lithuanian border in case it wants to jump over

right: prestige. obviously the nonuses scale

kill the rebels by spreading the plague...

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Never mind, turns out that actually, he can stay on the council, i can't appoint peasants but they can remain on if they're already there. Good to know
New development, doubt this will ever come up, nice scripted event, we're moving in on our enemies.

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Finally those 2 villages are cored, now for the general assimilation plan... people are no longer being expelled and look at all the ethnic poles moving in to take the tribesmens' place. What a sight... there's even a singular jew

those poles sure love their jews

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I'm such a tactical genius

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Honestly? not thrilled about the losses.

i'm about to busk

what do your vassal borders look like? i know you were complaining about that the other day

Can´t stand it anymore. All new gsgs suck. Might try the football games to satisfy my gsg urges.

>257 posts in the archive
>136 posts in the live thread
woah

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That's a complicated question, each one of them has their own reason for looking like that.
All the polish vassals other than Łomża, that is vassals Poland starts with, look like that because that's what they look like at 1337, with very minor changes of a few provinces that I gave to them.
Łomża is a vassal i created out of cofiscated Rawa provinces because I was hoping that they would be able to change a few conquests into Mazovian culture (which is polish and accepted), since i knew that if i released them from that province, they would be polish primary culture. BUT, lithuania supported independence of their rebels, and that dragged us into war with them... that the AI got control over the peacedeal thereof, which is comically shitty. their bordeers are horrendous.
Kaunas, Livonian order and their vassals (yes, my vassals have vassals) look like that because they already looked like that when Teutons were ruling over them, I just inherited their vassals. Kaunas is a knightly order also.
All the other vassals look like they do based on population, it may look like random border gore but it's actually calculated. I gave out land based on primary culture All of the southern former teuton vassals have prussian as their primary culture. Pomesania and Warmia each got land which is majority prussian, in Warmia's case a single province. Samland got a single province that has no majority culture (melting pot of a bunch of them), i figured since nobody can full core it, they might as well have it and at least convert it to christianity
Łmoża was given that much land because that has about 10% mazovian (their culture) in each province, and I don't want poles being assimilated away from poledom.
Really it's just that AI peacedeal being ass that fucked this whole thing over, borders weren't bad before that IMO.
There's a bigger problem anyway...

nice holy polish empire there bro

i am so not reading all that

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thanks i try my best :)
idk when, game didn't tell me this beyond a little easly ignorable pip at the bottom right of the screen, had to scroll down to find it, but... Kyiv joined the war.
I only found out after disbanding my armies. Vassals are still going strong though, and honestly, idk if the vassal swarm isn't enough at this point. What do? Their capital, unlike that of Volhynia, has a fort, but it's the first fort that we see, right in the open. What's the play here, occupy a bit for more warscore, or try to siege them down and get money out of them too?
Then there's the meme option of making them convert to catholic, which isn't such a meme option because it'll either make it so that they're no longer a threat, or they succed and at some point, when this is ours, we don't have to convert it ourselves. I'll let you decide, has this war lasted long enough?

Keep in mind the CB is pretty bad so I can take at most like 1 province, this was really meant to just be a quick money+warreps type thing

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quick stackwipe in the meantime, wish i could take prisoners, i know that's am echanic but for some reason i can never actually get it to work

i so read all of that
thanks for answer my question

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It might be over, you guys SUCK at replying on time, i wanted to do some tactics here and there and fucked up badly. Vassals are behind lines, I lost a lot of good men to attrition, at this point they're starving and without intervention will likely get killed.

This is where I leave you. This is what you've done by not replying on time. Next time, I'll wait longer.

What's next? Cut losses and get a peace deal, or ignore the vassals, raise more levies and continue fighting? If fight, then for what?

do what's more prudent in the long run
from what you said, it sounds like you should peace out and rebuild your pops 'n sheeeeeit
and then when you're feeling froggy, you jump and wardec kyiv and take their pussy and rename it to kiev
and then do whatever feels right: release those hohol tossers or keep 'em

or hell, maybe you can release only half and keep the other half... because you feel like roleplaying as a major dickhead? ;)

take max money so you can build up a proper kingdom, expanding too much more only gives very diminished return as it will just fuck your crown power more and delay your core growth
that being said do whatever you feel happy with and it'll be fine, you can always come back later and cobelligerent kyib

sorry bro your campaign just isnt interesting
are you a pole though

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Hi guys, new to Hearts of Iron III. I have some experience in CKII, CKIII, and Imperator, but this is the first time I've played HoI. I'm enjoying my campaign so far, but I'm at something of a standstill and not sure how to proceed. I've managed to stall the German offensive here, and there hasn't been a major battle in eight months or so. They can't attack into my positions along the river but I also can't really attack into them. It would make my life a lot easier if Germany had declared war on Belgium, but Belgium are still neutral for now. Italy and Japan are also uninvolved in the war, but Italy is slowly adding soldiers to my southern border. What do you advise I should be doing here?

navally invade iceland and norway

but he's playing as france not britain why would he invade neutral nations?

because its a videogame and attacking nations is fun in theem

which eu5 italic nation shall i play. Milan?

why not play a bold nation instead?

yeah you should play as ulm and make germany bigger

milan if you want to chile blob
verona if you want to tryhard

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he is bold. but i´m already over this game

i closed the Game. Good Job Paradox. Bravo!

subscribed

eu4 or stellaris?

ck3

closed eu5, thinking of going full Loverslab CK3 but i forgot my login and its a bit of work again.

is sex appeal the only thing you see in that game

are you gonna play the tranny mod

every mod is a tranny mod as far as i'm concerned

can we all at least agree that eu5 looks much, much better than vic3... and arguably even better than ck3...

yes, there is zero doubt about that because both vicky3 and cicky3 are absolute garbage
for euiiiii there's hope but it's not good yet

well i doubt eu5 is going to change in aesthetic, the map is still going to look like that 8 years from now
the aesthetic of the windows and buttons probably as well, although they might reorganize how to find and access everything

>for euiiiii there's hope
lol
lmao
the way they overcomplicated the tech tree alone should clue you in to the fact that they have no idea what they're doing or want to do

oh we're talking about the aesthetic? the aesthetic of the ui is fine, but the map is the same shitty playdough as eu4 i hate it so much

47
alex grandi will fix it

grandi is too busy suckling on my schnitzel

*adds 13 new nigger cultures*

>cicky3
>absolute garbage
hwhy

vgh the immersive world of subsaharan fanfiction

johan explained it best in her video

alex grandi is dead, i forgot to ventilate the dungeon i locked him in when i took that vacation trip to italy a few years ago, and he succumbed to heat stroke as a result

of all the euphemisms to call ur dick you chose "schnitzel"???
you know they're not phallic but flat, right? and before they're breaded they're beaten with a meat tenderizer

just the way the females like em

some ppl are into that

>>2446956
>before they're breaded they're beaten with a meat tenderizer
Where’s the lie?

don't reply to me ever again

don't let him tell you what to do

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>New world order in the Horn of Africa

nubbians

nubbers

>newbia

ok but when are you invading poland?

Did you know that in Polish Nubia is called "Nubia"? Now you do!

https://voca.ro/1he65gdCqJdb

still waiting for reasons hwhy cicky3 is absolute garbage

why do you sound so brain-dead
go lay down and try to sleep for 8 hours

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WARNING You are able to load save games from 1.2.X versions but our testing indicated that you will probably encounter your country in a unrecoverable state due to how many rules of the game have changed. For this reason we highly recommend starting a new save with 1.3

NOTICE Saves from 1.3.X (Those started from within the open beta) should load without issue, but we advise creating back ups first at your own discrestion.

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>89

>eu5 update
let me guess, this shit comes with new bugs and is going to need a few hot fixes remedy them

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>EU4 with anti-blobbing mod

>guys i installed some rearded "rebalance" mod and shocking twist, it made the game worse!
this is why i stopped going to the civ general, dont bring that cancer here

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It made colonization a little bit slower. And revolts are often catastrophic but not for the Mamluks and Catholic military orders.

play meme mods
get memed on

how do I pirate these games

cs.rin.ru

^viruss don't click

>89
youre trans, you should play liqqy with me

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Rip my economy. Yemen betrayed too

noobia

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>liqqy
sorry but i don't play memegames

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Nvm I have an idea. Misr just went bankrupt a few months ago as well.

cute anime boys general

dead generals general

no generals here goy4boy
only kings and admirals

>shit general general
This is the 4th or 5th general I've spawned, plus making my king a general. we wuz kangs

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>forgor
60 army tradition btw and 3 mil points for the king

Christian Nubia? Holy Based

>Christian Nubia? Holy Based
arent they xian by default?

they used to be in the before times but now theres beja and makuria is muslim too

Makuria is christian they just flip muslim every game for some reason. I started as Makuria

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dongola is shia, beja sunni, rest are coptic

any of you ever reply to someone else in here

>>2447178
no

i do, but only if the post i'm addressing is a post that i have to scroll up to see
i don't do that put-two-digit-number-in-my-post shit because i'm not counting on the other guy to notice it, fuck that

damn i'm in the mood to play a war game again
i've tried hoi3, now i'm going to give panzer corps 2 a shot
just gotta' find out how to crack that
slytherine games are tricky to pirate and run

>>2447178
nah, i´m not like this

File: 20260709234125_1.jpg (503 KB, 1920x1080)

503 KB JPG

Got what I needed; with Qara Qoyonlu out of the war I decided to peace out for aruond ~60% ws. It's a shame as 100% would have been all of Egypt and then some but I'm not too confident I can keep advancing with 170k turks now focused on me. At this point even if I have to concede Hejaz this seems like a fair trade

99
idk man, every time i see a two digit number i scroll up to see the last post with those two digits. takes like a second. git gut scrub

>>2447258
'kay, got it

so coked on coffee uuggghhhh good shit

taking a land connection to the med / turk land was probably the worst choice you could have made, now they can actually take your land