r/zillowgonewild Jan 04 '26

What is going on here?

I can't quite put my finger on it, but something feels off...

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/560-County-Road-1192-Cullman-AL-35057/215020868_zpid/

2.2k Upvotes

327 comments sorted by

803

u/OlafVonShizer- Jan 04 '26

Anyone notice the giant snapping turtle hanging from the ceiling?

249

u/DrawingAsleep6284 Jan 04 '26

This is hysterical. I thought you made it up so I had to go back and look again 🤣🤣

135

u/antibroleague Jan 04 '26

Hey buddy, that’s a load bearing turtle right there

70

u/DrawingAsleep6284 Jan 04 '26

Why does the turtle look so frightened?!

157

u/curlyqtips Jan 04 '26

Turtleboy is coming...

21

u/esquilax Jan 04 '26

Equus sequel just dropped.

15

u/whyyoufollowingme Jan 05 '26

What demented municipality put up a statue of young man molesting a sea turtle?

23

u/curlyqtips Jan 05 '26

It's pretty amazing. The original artist committed suicide after the sculpture began speaking to him.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burnside_Fountain

7

u/whyyoufollowingme Jan 05 '26

Whoa … this got way darker. Thanks for sharing as that is a pretty amazing story.

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43

u/Mort-i-Fied Jan 04 '26

He has seen things. Get out, before it's too late for you too.

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8

u/stargarnet79 Jan 04 '26

All of the subreddit awards to you sir olafvonshizer

5

u/greyleef Jan 04 '26

GAMERA!!

3

u/MyHGC Jan 04 '26

his name is Vengeance

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598

u/AcanthaceaeOk3738 Jan 04 '26

749

u/hummelm10 Jan 04 '26

12-inch exterior walls for strength and efficiency. Security features include a coded front gate, high-quality camera system, and roll-down doors on all entry points

Definitely seems like a prepper

254

u/tavenger5 Jan 04 '26 edited Jan 04 '26

12-inch exterior walls

With a metal roof about 1/32" thick (0.6mm)

Edit: i was wrong - its a double roof! See /u/Bad-Touch-Monkey 's comment below

172

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '26

[deleted]

103

u/TheSamurabbi Jan 04 '26

I mean, tbf, if we end up getting the kinda zombies that can climb up to the roof, we’re cooked all around anyway

53

u/Head_Attempt7983 Jan 04 '26

The urinal is a nice touch.

63

u/rose-tintedglasses Jan 04 '26

I knew a prepper whose ridiculously reinforced safe room was a ground floor bathroom with a urinal.

Must be a club thing.

We Stand Prepared (To Pee)

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121

u/Bad-Touch-Monkey Jan 04 '26

That’s a pan roof. You see the flat underside is a pan where reinforced concrete is poured. Usually used as a flooring system in commercial or large multifamily applications. Likely the roof is 4-6in on lightweight concrete with the pitched metal roof on top for aesthetics

17

u/tavenger5 Jan 04 '26

Looks like you're right! TIL

21

u/Cueller Jan 04 '26

It stops the aliens mind control devices.

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8

u/bannana Jan 04 '26

yep, seem like a couple of whacks with a hammer and a good stomping would get you through the roof of that sun room.

11

u/Ponklemoose Jan 04 '26

Judging by the doors, I think the sun room is outside the secure area.

102

u/JustTheBeerLight Jan 04 '26

A prepper with a bidet?!?

125

u/Character-Special945 Jan 04 '26

Saves on toilet paper and waste in the septic system

35

u/atomic_blonde Jan 04 '26

...holy shit. I feel so incredibly stupid for not making this connection about lessening the load on the septic. After years of casually thinking about getting some, this comment finally sold me.

15

u/socialsecurityguard Jan 04 '26

They sell bidet attachments that hook up to your toilet. You can even tap into the hot water pipe of the sinke to adjust the water temp you use. Highly recommend. You'll love it.

6

u/digitalwankster Jan 04 '26

You don’t even need to hook up to hot water, most of them these days are powered and heat the water on demand.

3

u/burlycabin Jan 04 '26

Finding power next to the toilet might more difficult that hot water though.

22

u/Turd_hurdin Jan 04 '26

And feels nice too(so I’ve heard)… lol

60

u/CustomMerkins4u Jan 04 '26

Clean your ass with water or smear it around with some dry toilet paper?

Water wins, every time.

23

u/df540148 Jan 04 '26

They are life changing and I'm not kidding. So sad when we're away from home at a place without one.

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117

u/SearchOver Jan 04 '26

He learned his lesson during COVID?

20

u/Socialimbad1991 Jan 04 '26

There are dozens of us! Dozens!!!

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169

u/KauaiWahine Jan 04 '26

The centerpiece of the property is a 2,905 sq. ft. home built with 12-inch exterior walls for strength and efficiency. Security features include a coded front gate, high-quality camera system, and roll-down doors on all entry points. The home has 2 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms with quality finishes throughout. Inside the main bedroom, there is a concrete storm room, that has the ability to lock, and remain discreet if needed.

So much more prepper stuff on top of this.

91

u/ReadontheCrapper Jan 04 '26

They easily could have worded this as tornado and/or hurricane protections… easily.

22

u/Flimsy_RaisinDetre Jan 04 '26

Locks to keep out “weather”

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6

u/Ok-Young-2731 Jan 04 '26

With the metal truss ceeling beams and corrugated roofing? Picture 4.

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59

u/sweet_pickles12 Jan 04 '26

“Lock, and remain discreet”

So, a dungeon

9

u/browneyedgirlpie Jan 04 '26

I wanted to see it

8

u/candiescorner Jan 04 '26

Yeah, like from the purge

5

u/demonmonkeybex Jan 04 '26

Seems more like zombie apocalypse type shit.

62

u/aprillerockstar Jan 04 '26

My first reaction when I saw it was in Cullman was, "Oh, it's in Cullman."

I had family there. This fits 😆

16

u/the_beeve Jan 04 '26

Family lived south of here past Montgomery. Absolutely no thanks

9

u/Banshee_howl Jan 04 '26

I got a bit depressed when I saw I could buy a 4-5 BR lake house for just a bit more than my 120 year old 2 BR cottage on the west coast. Then I considered that lake house would be in Alabama and I have all my teeth. I just wouldn’t fit in.

9

u/aprillerockstar Jan 05 '26

Heyyyyy, most of us have all our teeth these days! Alabama really isn't what people expect overall. Cullman probably is, but there are parts of Alabama that have come a very long way. And Cullman is actually a beautiful place, just a little more old school than, say, Birmingham or Huntsville. But the west coast (and a 120-year-old cottage!) is also amazing, so I wouldn't necessarily say you're missing out!

8

u/mattyofurniture Jan 04 '26

Is it Wackadoodle Central?

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4

u/GoodTheory3304 Jan 04 '26

I live nearby, I mostly attribute ours to redneck engineers that work at the arsenal. Cullman seems like it would be too far of a drive for that, do you have a lot of those types?

18

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '26

The house doesn't appeal to me but that's a very cool property, it really has everything.

19

u/herecomestherebuttal Jan 04 '26

Yep. The answer is almost always prepper or Mormons.

6

u/milanmirolovich Jan 04 '26

all the rich bastards know we're going to be coming for them when society starts collapsing in a few years.  I hope when the time comes we can still make them all pay like they deserve 

4

u/3DigitIQ Jan 04 '26

The YT video give a great overview too; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWqKOU6Ny8I

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399

u/CompleteSavings6307 Jan 04 '26 edited Jan 04 '26

Theres commercial grade stuff here.

With the exposed ceiling and fire drop doors, and the standing urinal, it almost reminds me of a bar or winery establishment that serves people food or drinks.

someone owned a business and told the contractor to make it a livable area

196

u/Jupitersd2017 Jan 04 '26

My thought was a converted distillery

56

u/CompleteSavings6307 Jan 04 '26

Exactly. If it was true, its too bad they didnt leave the equipment. Mother of all mancaves would be an actual place where the magic sauce is made.

18

u/Jupitersd2017 Jan 04 '26

Unfortunately they probably had to fire sell it off with all of the craft beers/moonshine/hobby people that pop up and go out of business, the stuff they left looks pretty shiny compared to the much cooler old/slightly rusted look - that would be a cool place

48

u/ValleyOakPaper Jan 04 '26

When I saw that big boiler door, mine was crematorium. ☠️

3

u/Jupitersd2017 Jan 04 '26

Haha that would be interesting indeed

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7

u/Ok-Young-2731 Jan 04 '26

I would say convered farm building, like shop or storage converted to flip/property, those rolling doors good for either loading/unloading or pulling into cover, now looks like a foyer added on to hide them as "storm shutters" but still a corrugated roof, look at pictured 4

5

u/ButteredPizza69420 Jan 04 '26

I thought it hurricane protection

40

u/AcanthisittaLive6135 Jan 04 '26

Imagine the cargo shorts on this owner

34

u/candiescorner Jan 04 '26

It reminds me of the house from the purge

10

u/Voodoodriver Jan 04 '26

Definitely ready for the purge.

10

u/Echo-Azure Jan 04 '26

Didn't the old New York industrial lofts look like that, before they were all converted into luxury housing?

17

u/DDiamondgem Jan 04 '26

Yes! I’m from NYC and wondering what is so odd about it except the horrible furniture and lack of any type of decoration

14

u/Echo-Azure Jan 04 '26

What's so odd about it, is that it's in Alabama. The Alabama countryside!

Trying to make yourself feel like you're in a NYC loft when you're way out in the country, is odd indeed.

9

u/DDiamondgem Jan 04 '26

I mean the esthetics aren’t odd to me. I’ve been in lofts before that were awesome. I know where it is. I just don’t think it’s that strange.

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5

u/Ovaltine1 Jan 04 '26

I was thinking school.

18

u/jrocksexbang Jan 04 '26

Didn't get to the part where it said located in Alabama, eh?

8

u/monkypanda34 Jan 04 '26

They'd be mad if they could read, or have internet

3

u/AnyFoundation4784 Jan 04 '26

Not just Alabama, but Cullman - a well known "Sundown Town". If you don't know what that means, look it up.

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323

u/Flat_Reason889 Jan 04 '26

Definitely giving prepper but considering the build date, this feels more like someone who survived the April 2011 tornado outbreak and didn't want to risk it ever again.

Cullman was hit with an EF4 that day. I'd build 12 inch thick walls too.

56

u/ahorrribledrummer Jan 04 '26

You'd probably build a reinforced gabled roof and not a corrugated metal one too.

27

u/Flat_Reason889 Jan 04 '26

That is very true. I saw that and wondered if the money ran out.

4

u/Gibbie42 Jan 04 '26

So no money for any interior walls either then?

5

u/OldFlourLungs Jan 04 '26

Giving prepper what?

11

u/No_Significance_4118 Jan 04 '26

It's Gen-z slang.

It means something like "Definitely (could be | feels like) a prepper house, but considered the...", I guess.

12

u/OldFlourLungs Jan 04 '26

Oh ok. Sorry, I’m an old person.

5

u/No_Significance_4118 Jan 04 '26

Same here, no need to be sorry, the first time I saw it, I reacted the exact same way.

Next time you see someone asking, it's your moment to pay it forward as well. :)

5

u/OldFlourLungs Jan 04 '26

I’m ready!

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114

u/NeedANewHelmet Jan 04 '26

Needs ceilings.

They've tried to do an industrial type look with the exposed steel joists, but the regular household furniture and cabinets just don't work with that aesthetic.

49

u/NonsensicalBumblebee Jan 04 '26

I feel if your place has a certain distinctive style, you just gotta lean into it. The wooden cabinets look horrible there, but if you lean into the industrial style it would probably look great. Add some concrete. Turn the kitchen black and metal. Make the beds metal. Get one of those planning tables as a dinner table. Minimalist couches, and so on and so forth.

6

u/ErnestGoesToNewark Jan 04 '26

Reminds me of a Fresh Prince of Bel Air episode.

https://youtu.be/dIaEAadd-SU?si=NjAmRpcrVQJeoUKI

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86

u/DangleBob91 Jan 04 '26

This is either a compound or a cult bunker. And they both feel the same

27

u/hmspain Jan 04 '26

Love the zombie apocalypse doors!

17

u/Timely_Apricot3929 Jan 04 '26

That go over the only windows! No windows in bedrooms or any interior room. So bleak.

9

u/MyHGC Jan 04 '26

At least once a day I'd yell "Close the blast doors!!"

53

u/3Gloins_in_afountain Jan 04 '26

Life is hard enough.

Put down some carpet and put up curtains.

46

u/ImpressivePlatypus0 Jan 04 '26

Where's the link? Did this used to be a firehouse or something?

36

u/VetusCorvus Jan 04 '26

Do you think this was purpose made or a repurposed commercial building? If it’s the former, the giant fucking boiler in the living room is a …. Umm….. An interesting choice.

12

u/ALWanders Jan 04 '26

I suspect it is just the end part and doors used as decoration to fit the industrial vibe.

3

u/Ponklemoose Jan 04 '26

From the location and modest size, I'd say purpose built.

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31

u/GrumpyPacker Jan 04 '26 edited Jan 05 '26

I live near this one. Area is also tornado prone. Seems the Culman area is always getting hit the last few years. Prepping would also fit.

19

u/cybah Jan 04 '26

If it wasn't for the prepper nonsense, the rest of the space gives off 'tv/movie soundstage' vibe with the floroscent lights, high industrial ceilings and hvac, and how all the walls cut off like a tv or movie set.

5

u/Timely_Apricot3929 Jan 04 '26

I was thinking the same thing, looks like a set!

20

u/curlyqtips Jan 04 '26

These prepper houses always make me wonder why they are selling; did they decide that the end times aren't happening after all? Did they buy an island as a prepper upgrade home? Did they die of something mundane before the zombies arrived?

6

u/Substantial-Brick-90 Jan 04 '26

Property tax jumped 224.7% from last year maybe. That’s all that jumps out at me in public records. Public records doesn’t even say it’s for sale, let alone what kind of sale it is so who knows.

https://dashboard.publicrecords.us/al/cullman/560-county-rd-1192/35057-piq232804340

5

u/Karmakarma_karmeleon Jan 04 '26

Finally someone asking the real questions! 

15

u/willrunfornachos Jan 04 '26

like a storage unit and a movie set had a baby together. the location is sweet though...

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15

u/Select-Team-6863 Jan 04 '26 edited Jan 04 '26

This is exactly the kind of house I come here for.

Can't help but notice they have a repository for ghosts.

13

u/Any-Grapefruit-937 Jan 04 '26

So.many.questions. That giant furnace door or whatever it is gives me chills.

5

u/Lepardopterra Jan 04 '26

I see three bedrooms, and the ad says two. Also, two ensuite full baths, but no powder room for guests. Guess they don’t have people over.

5

u/3DigitIQ Jan 04 '26

That 3rd bed is in the "storm room"

12

u/huntwithdad Jan 04 '26

Where are the pictures of the indoor heated pool? Wtf!?

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10

u/BorntoRizz Jan 04 '26

Don’t hate it. Comes with 153 acres.

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8

u/notanybodyelse Jan 04 '26

Vampires.

6

u/phjenny Jan 04 '26

My first thought was zombies

9

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '26

150 acres, a lake, indoor heated pool, and much more. $1.7M, $3500 a year in taxes? Sounds like a steal to me.

8

u/LolotheWitch Jan 04 '26

I can’t help myself, I really like this for some reason. That last picture of the open doors to the pond is gorgeous.

8

u/silvermanedwino Jan 04 '26

Culty prepper bunker.

8

u/papercutsperfume Jan 04 '26

This sub gets a lot of culty architecture, but Cullman is in a tornado corridor that got hit spectacularly hard 15 years ago.

On the afternoon of April 27, 2011, a large, long-tracked, and violent high-end EF4 multi-vortex tornado, known by most as the Cullman–Arab tornado,[1] moved across north-central Alabama, in the United States, striking numerous towns along its 47-mile (76 km) track, including Cullman, Fairview, Arab and Ruth. The tornado killed 6, injured over 40, and impacted hundreds of structures. It occurred as part of the largest tornado outbreak in modern history, and was the second violent tornado of the outbreak, touching down after the Philadelphia, Mississippi tornado.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2011_Cullman%E2%80%93Arab_tornado#:~:text=On%20the%20afternoon%20of%20April,%2C%20Fairview%2C%20Arab%20and%20Ruth.

7

u/UnderstandingOwn320 Jan 04 '26

I was distracted by this lil guy

6

u/Sprouty0 Jan 04 '26

Seems like illegal bedrooms with no windows/outdoor egress.

3

u/Annual-Beard-5090 Jan 04 '26

Its Alabama. No building codes to follow Ill bet.

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6

u/hopstop5000 Jan 04 '26

In the south we call this Red Necks with Paychecks-Especially in Alabama, they show off by building stupid shit like this. I’m surprised it doesn’t have the typical metal Harley or man cave signs up or the always classic stop sign with bullet holes. It’s probably some guy that built this but in order to get his wife to agree to it he had to add some somewhat higher end cabinets and tub etc. for her so she’d come up to “the cabin”.

6

u/mikerex0821 Jan 05 '26

The roll down doors means he is ready for the purge!

5

u/metaphori Jan 04 '26

That toilet's a headbanger. Yikes.

5

u/WaffleHouseGladiator Jan 04 '26 edited Jan 04 '26

It's a pretty ideal TEOTWAKI/prepper house, though there are a few changes I'd make.

8

u/wtfisplastic Jan 04 '26

Wow I haven’t seen TEOTWAWKI used in forever!

4

u/WaffleHouseGladiator Jan 04 '26

I mean, it fits, right? Farmland, security shutters, off grid power, flag pole, remote looking location, industrial vibe...

6

u/fuzzywuzzypete Jan 04 '26

id live there

6

u/isabelladangelo Jan 04 '26

Report for no link.

5

u/kevnmartin Jan 04 '26

The Home Show, the Home Show, the big Atalanta Home Show. Come on Saturday, kids get in half price!

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5

u/EniNeutrino Jan 04 '26

Super weird, but I think it could really be a beautiful home for the right person. I mean I definitely love the closet!

4

u/hmflaherty3 Jan 04 '26

You've stumbled upon Dale Gribbles house. (King of the Hill)

6

u/WorthAd3223 Jan 04 '26

This house is perfect for both preppers and drug lords!

5

u/PoodleMomFL Jan 04 '26

For really scared people

4

u/immaculatelawn Jan 04 '26

Do the cows convey with the property?

5

u/McAndersen Jan 04 '26

A urinal AND bidet is quite the statement.

4

u/HoliestCactus Jan 04 '26

No joke, this is my dad's dream home. Right down to the warehouse ceilings, brick and liminal bedspace

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4

u/cfo6 Jan 04 '26

That just looks so cold. Like it never, ever gets warm. The thought of taking a shower in that bathroom makes me shiver.

3

u/kaptaincorn Jan 04 '26

Not a lot of windows

This is a compound for human trafficking or sisters wives?

4

u/KongUnleashed Jan 05 '26

Alabamian here. Cullman is…uh…j-just don’t fuckin’ go there.

3

u/CatskillsCoffeeGuy Jan 05 '26

Super bizarre place. Feels like a luxury bachelor bunker. And not in a good way.

5

u/tripdaisies Jan 05 '26

It’s a fortified, off grid house-some nutty pepper was prepping for a Zombie Apocalypse.

3

u/redthump Jan 04 '26

Prepper zombie chic

3

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '26

It's like this was designed as a compromise between two unhappily marrieds a la The Roses. 

One wanted a microbrew pub and the other a porn studio so...

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3

u/Less-Load-8856 Jan 04 '26

The likable bits exist in equal proportion to the wtf bits.  

3

u/Sweaty_Marzipan4274 Jan 04 '26

Lopro safe house. Awesome

3

u/Odd-End-1405 Jan 04 '26

Okay. I get you are afraid of the zombie apocalypse, but why no finished ceilings and a need of a toilet, bidet, AND urinal in each bathroom?

Five underground propane tanks?!

3

u/HedgeCowFarmer Jan 04 '26

Euro-peein’ with all the bidets

3

u/CasualSleeper Jan 04 '26

I actually love this surprisingly, makes me feel like im loving in a warehouse kitchen.

3

u/justbecoolguys Jan 04 '26

Looks like a sound stage where TLC would film interviews for their reality tv shows.

3

u/dreams_andnightmares Jan 04 '26

Looks like a converted warehouse turned residential property done wrong. Or it could be a cult house.

3

u/BlueThat33 Jan 04 '26

I wonder what they failed to prepare for that led to them selling the house

3

u/UngregariousDame Jan 05 '26

Alien: we heard about houses does this look right to you? Person: ?????!!?!!!!!??????

3

u/West-Ingenuity-2874 Jan 06 '26

Looks like a bunker?

2

u/Fine-Bumblebee-9427 Jan 04 '26

I’m guessing designed by a dude as a barndominium, no outside inputs. Just made a big ass box to live in.

2

u/WolvesandTigers45 Jan 04 '26

One of the few things to get me to go back to Alabama

2

u/WillametteWanderer Jan 04 '26

Just a slight lack of personality.

2

u/incpen Jan 04 '26

The henchmen will be back any minute…

2

u/Well_ImTrying Jan 04 '26

It’s industrial chic, but make it tasteful 00’s soccer mom.

2

u/United-Resident-7316 Jan 04 '26

Having cabinets directly over the toilets was a choice. Prepping for the end of the world and forgot people don’t want to duck their head when pinching a loaf.

2

u/ericomplex Jan 04 '26

Idk but their staging is terrible… And I kinda want it to renovate.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '26

Sweet Home Alabama

2

u/samsmiles456 Jan 04 '26

Save on family cremation fees.

2

u/BoardsofCanada3 Jan 04 '26

A lot of this, especially that uncomfortably large kitchen/living area, looks like a TV studio filming set

2

u/CataclysmicBees Jan 04 '26

It reminds me of old 2010s indie horror game maps. Where you can tell the map makers didn't have a lot to work with. Walls/floors/ceilings are the same in every room. Questionable furniture/decoration choices/placements/amounts. Rooms comically larger than needed so you can run away from the monsters.

2

u/cxtx3 Jan 04 '26

It's kind of giving "Midsommar" but Mid-West. Super weird vibes all around. It's oddly industrial but also with dated grandma furniture, and it clashes in a way that just feels culty.

2

u/astroboy7070 Jan 04 '26

Failed prepper

2

u/napalm_beach Jan 04 '26

Let's talk about lighting...

2

u/woobiewarrior69 Jan 04 '26

It was built in 2012, the world was obsessed with zombies at the time.

2

u/picked1st Jan 04 '26

A part of me wants to say...human/sex trafficking.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '26

Ugh did that use to be a crematorium???

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2

u/InsuranceNo3422 Jan 04 '26

The listing said an indoor pool but didn't include a picture of it.

2

u/neon_crone Jan 04 '26

“Kids, go watch tv in the loading dock.”

2

u/jendet010 Jan 04 '26

Prepper bunker or safe house for a drug lord

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2

u/ForagedFoodie Jan 04 '26

Alabama. I cannot imagine the AC bill to cool this place in Alabama.

2

u/waazzub Jan 04 '26

You want to feel like you live in IKEA?

2

u/Stickyfynger Jan 04 '26

Jarvis: start barn door protocol

2

u/judseubi Jan 04 '26

It almost looks like someone put together a showroom (for lack of a better word) comprised of every single Home Depot display. Like a living portfolio for a contractor. Odd.

2

u/Pointless_Lawndarts Jan 04 '26

No carpet or rugs. Gonna be real cacophonous in there…. What did you say?!?

Turn your Zelda down…

2

u/mcbawk Jan 04 '26

This is what I imagine my colony housing looks like .when I start a new game in Rim World

2

u/PsychologicalExam717 Jan 04 '26

For the Zombie apocalypse.

2

u/Klutzy-Ad-3286 Jan 04 '26

Why is there a boiler door in the wall

2

u/ElephantEarTag Jan 04 '26

How could you sleep in that bed thinking "what a nice brick wall", but ignoring the industrial ceiling. That's disgusting.

2

u/ironicart Jan 04 '26

During the summer the sun doesn’t set, if you want a full “night” mode, you need to close off the outside entirely

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