Word Count 138
The 28 Days of Rain Challenge
No beta. All mistakes are mine.
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Strength failed him; he sank to his knees in the wet grass as the rain pelted his back in stinging, icy needles. Guilt was a wicked mistress that flayed his heart and left it raw and wounded. When would his agony stop?
He tried to talk his way out of it, but it hadn’t made any difference. Pushed into a gunfight by yet another disillusioned kid, Johnny Madrid Lancer was left to pick up the pieces; he struggled to pull himself together — to deal with the nightmares — the sightless eyes, the blood. Every time it happened, a small part of his soul was taken away, and soon, there would be nothing left of him.
Johnny turned his face toward the sky; the rain washed over his haunted features; was it enough to wash the guilt from his heart?
February 2024
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oh this was so good. Char
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Hey there, aeolia55! Thank you for reading and commenting!
Diana (not Char)
Buckskin
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Very moving. My heart breaks for Johnny.
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Hi Tina – Yes, Johnny Madrid carried a lot on his shoulders, and much stemmed from things beyond his control. Thank you for reading and sending feedback.
Diana
Buckskin
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Short story with a huge punch. Well done & thank you.
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Hi, Helen – Thank you for the comment – it was much like Johnny himself. He wasn’t a very big man in stature, but he packed one heck of a punch as JML, didn’t he?
Thanks for reading.
Diana
Buckskin
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Very much so Diana. A giant of a man.
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So much said in so few words. Thank you for posting.
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Hi, Val97 – Thank you for reading and commenting. This exercise was limited to 150 – Not enough to write about JML! Thanks for commenting.
Diana
Buckskin
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Just when Johnny seems to get used to his new life the past rises up to take him down. I think your story shows the reality of Johnny’s life. Thank you for posting this.
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Hey there, drduke! Thank you for reading and sending feedback on this ‘shorty’. I’m glad you enjoyed it. 150 words isn’t enough for me – it is a tease, and I want a story I can sink my teeth into and completely absorb the characters, plot, thoughts, and scenery. But that’s just me. But I’m happy it worked for you! Thanks again!
Diana
Buckskin
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