ihavereallydumbideasReblogged swampgh0sttbatmanisagatewaydrugFollowre: the loneliness epidemic post, it's genuinely so so so hard right now as someone whose Job is organizing events for LGBT university students. our whole goal is to help them find peers to connect with, but it often feels like they're working against us. not on purpose, of course, and I never want to sound like I'm blaming students for their own feelings of isolation. there are a lot of factors that make it hard to socialize, ranging from a very full class/work schedule to various neurodivergences to the majority white attendance at many campus activities to the fact that many of these students spent some formative years in quarantine. but man, it's hard when students talk about feeling hated and unwanted by a club because no one there talks to them, only to drop that they never even try to initiate any conversation themselves. or when a student complains that they're not making any friends on campus, but when asked where they're going to meet people outside of class they seem confused and say they hardly leave their dorm for anything but class. we're currently administering an anonymous survey to assess student satisfaction with our programs, and one person wrote that they'd like to attend more of our events but don't because they don't know anyone there and don't know what the vibe will be. the solution to both of those problems feels very obvious, to me, and it's frustrating to see mild uncertainty be such a hurdle. especially given that, again, these are queer young people, who a.) have a lot of reasons to despair right now and b.) have a lot of awful online spaces they could be spending time in instead of touching grass, it's a fucking bummer to see them so wary of hanging out in physical space with real people. johannestevansA skill i've been working to get better at when I go to conferences and conventions is to basically approach tables of interesting looking people and going "May I join you?" and listening to their conversation and joining inAnd it is a skill! You are approaching strangers, you are making a bid for connection and interaction that may end in rejection, or just not clicking fully, or anything similar, and that can be scary!But I think a problem that a lot of younger people have in how harshly regimented many schools and then colleges are, and ditto how little free time they're likely to have outside of their workplace and commute, made worse by isolated housing and lack of free or even affordable third spacesIs that there's very little development of the skill of seeking out the people who look interesting or otherwise compatible with yourself, approaching them, and beginning the process of connecting with themPeople are very used to only making new friends and connections when circumstances, and especially an authority, force them into proximity with one anotherEsp in a surveillance state where there's anxieties about meeting new people in case they're bad or incompatible with your beliefs, sometimes people only want to connect with new people when they can scope them out on socials first, and that only adds to this anxiety of meeting people as a social skill!wiseguynephiletbh if i was chilling at a table talking with my friends and some rando walked up and said "may i join you?" i would be offended and creeped outi do empathize with and agree with a lot of OP here but at the same time so much of that post and especially the reblog are placing all the onus on the lonely people. all the work of seeking out connection is being placed at the feet of the people with the least social power and wherewithal. why should that be how it worksif there's a cool group of people talking, i'm never going to walk up and bother them. they're the ones with a solid social footing and comfortable position, they're the ones who can afford to invite me in to what they're doing if they want to.if i'm new at college and I go to a club meeting, it's not my job as the newcomer to start conversations! I've got no social capital, if I try to start conversations I'm being intrusive and rude! It's their club and I'm some rando who wandered in! If I'm the newcomer it's their job to be welcoming if they want new people. I should be humble and wait, and they should be inviting me in and making me part of what's going on.all of this follows from the basic fact that our society is structured to reward pushiness and arrogance, and expects people to "assert themselves" and "put themselves out there" and look after their own interests. that's what we admire and that's what we expect, and even OP, firmly goodhearted and wanting to help these people, is seeing it as a failure on their parts that they're not pushy and rude enough to make friends. that's just a bad way to structure a society! the work of fixing loneliness should be done by people who aren't lonely; they're the ones with the power to do so.batmanisagatewaydrugokay. so. in the space of this answer you have both indicated that a.) you think the impetus of social inclusion should be on people who already have an existing social footing and also b.) if you were in a position of being the person with an existing social connection and the opportunity to make space and welcome others in you would find them offensive and creepy. so I'm not really sure what you want me to take from that. wiseguynephileI had a comfortable social position, then I would absolutely be using it to invite in other people who didn't have that. If you see an acquaintance (someone who's just joined the club you're in, for instance) standing around awkward and lonely, you throw them a line, you make them part of the conversation.If on the other hand they didn't wait to be invited but instead invited themselves, if a total stranger didn't just make themselves available but instead started acting like we were already friends, that is what I would find offensive and creepy.batmanisagatewaydrugyou do understand that we're talking about social events where the explicit purpose is for people to be making new connections and introducing themselves to each other, yes? ancelineonline… I’m beginning to see the problem you’re talking about OP. Also I’m taking bets on how long it is before this post results in the Ben Affleck smoke break photo. batmanisagatewaydrugyeah it's really ended up illustrating its own point in the worst way huh. really makes me feel like a certain Oscar-winning Bostonian. ihavereallydumbideasHonestly, the best starter isn’t “may I join you”, it’s “I love ur miku shirt, where’d you get it” or something along those lines. A random stranger become more welcoming when they indicate a shared interest - using the topic of conversation (especially if they’re talking about their hobbies or interests) as a connection point is the best thing to do!Also, club meetings specifically should have built-in opportunities for social connections - maybe a game night (people who like similar games or the same game can use that to connect, and it forces people into groups, and gives them time to talk about anything) or a costume contest/party (allows for more self-expression, including signaling of fandoms or style of humor via cosplays or joke-based costumes, and gives people a reason to start conversations with “how did you make that, it’s cool” or simply “what’s your costume” - both of these questions are very unintrusive and neutral)#the blame isn’t on anyone here#stranger danger has made it difficult to trust people you don’t know#and political differences make it difficult for minority groups (esp lgbt) to trust outsiders#it’s a societal issue#the only way out is through#and through means giving people little pushes out of their shell#but never bullying them out into the open#it has to be gradual#genuinely making friends by just going “hey u look cool’ is valid btw#<this is v effective btw#going ‘may i join you’ works better if u already know one or two people in the group#cuz then to everyone else ur a friend of a friend; not a stranger… See all2406,37510,514

ihavereallydumbideasRebloggedsteornFollowI like that english speakers can say anything with a "y" and it's understood as an affirmative. yep. yurp. yee. ya. yurr. yay #yipperdeeznuts#gottem2356,98321,165

ihavereallydumbideasRebloggedpliableheadFollow'you can smoke whatever drugs you want idgaf' and 'apartment building etiquette is such that i should not be able to instantly smell your rank-ass weed stank through our shared wall' are two sentiments that can both be true#so true#do whatever you want but i should be able to opt out#without needing a gas mask#<very important#as long as people that don’t wanna participate don’t have to be exposed ur fine#but if ur smoking weed that smells like the actual goddamn sewer treatment plant in your open air yard i’m using my sword… See all49915,45636,399

ihavereallydumbideasReblogged strange-aeonslezbianzFollowbeing a humanities major who’s friends with stem majors is so funny because you’ll ask your friends what they’re doing today and they’re like “UGH it’s so stressful i have to stabilize the reactor core for my nuclear power midterm and then i have to build the supercomputer from i have no mouth yet i must scream for my electrical engineering homework :/ what about you” and you’re like “oh well i have to read a fun little book and write an essay about gender.” and they still think you have it worsefreakinflipflopBeing a stem major who's friends with humanities majors is ALSO funny bc you ask what's goin on with them and they're like "oh yeah my day's pretty good! I only have to read 50 pages for this one class today and half a book for another one. It's much better than last week where I read three books and wrote a 10 page paper about their overlapping motifs for one class while also researching a niche period of time that our library doesn't have any resources on. How's it been for you?" and you're like "oh I have a lil packet of fun math puzzles due tomorrow." and they look at you like you're carrying the weight of the universe on your backtesriaThis is your reminder that just because something falls within the skillset you've practiced, so you can do it and you don't find it particularly hard or stressful relative to other things, it doesn't mean it isn't actually hard work you should be proud of yourself for accomplishing!3amfanfictionthis applies to writing and art, too#good messages#for everyone to remember#everything is a little bit like a muscle: the more you use it the stronger it becomes21365,23278,977

Sponsored

ihavereallydumbideasRebloggedwriting-prompt-sFollowEvery cleric has the ability to directly manifest their deity. It can only be done once in their lifetimes, and the cost is enormous. The invaders are getting ready to raze the town. You're the last defense, though you worship the god of harvest and childbirth, not war. You begin the ritual.ihavereallydumbideas“Hey can you make the entire invading force pregnant.”“What- mortal, wh-““Like right now. Pregnant them. Before they get here.”“…”“Please?”“What is wrong with you…”“Uhhh they’re getting really close. Can you-““Sure. Third trimester, about to give birth?”“Yep. Yep that’d be good.”(magic)(screaming heard in distance)“Thank you!”“I question the sanity of this realm. Goodbye. Please do not call me again.”#lmao my first idea492431,762

ihavereallydumbideaswhy do large trucks always end up behind melike i don’t want you there, get tf out#i’m always scared i’ll get crushed#i don’t think driving a mini helps#i try to be very respectful of the space trucks need in front of them#this does not help my fears#post partially inspired by the dipshit sedan in front of me today#they turned left (off of a main road) (after having suddenly braked to make the turn) and then SLAMMED the brakes 5 feet in#like damn bro be glad i’m quick on the pedals#they did this completely ignoring the driveway they could’ve pulled into… See all

ihavereallydumbideasRebloggedhomunculus-argumentFollowMy stance on everything is that there's no such thing as a bad idea, there's just wrong ways to execute it. Nothing is inherently impossible, you just need to have the exact right circumstances for all of the pieces to fall into place just right. And sometimes those are simply too statistically improbable to start gambling on, so it's not really worth the trouble. And sometimes they require things to work in ways that they literally never do, but it would work if they did. So nonetheless it's not an inherently bad idea, just one that's incompatible with the reality in which we currently live in.ihavereallydumbideasyknow i read the first line and was all “well capitalism is a bad idea”and then i read the rest and was like… damn bro u right. homunculus-argumentActually capitalism works exactly as intended: The goal is to churn out as much money as possible to like five people who already have more money than god while actively killing everyone and everything else.ihavereallydumbideas…well that is how it functions in the real world. and that isn’t good. but the “intention” of the ideology (notably: not the system that it has been implemented into, but the ideals the system is supposedly based on) is to encourage growth through competition, which is a good idea. it just doesn’t happen. because the ideology doesn’t translate into our world.102721,284

ihavereallydumbideasRebloggedhomunculus-argumentFollowMy stance on everything is that there's no such thing as a bad idea, there's just wrong ways to execute it. Nothing is inherently impossible, you just need to have the exact right circumstances for all of the pieces to fall into place just right. And sometimes those are simply too statistically improbable to start gambling on, so it's not really worth the trouble. And sometimes they require things to work in ways that they literally never do, but it would work if they did. So nonetheless it's not an inherently bad idea, just one that's incompatible with the reality in which we currently live in.ihavereallydumbideasyknow i read the first line and was all “well capitalism is a bad idea”and then i read the rest and was like… damn bro u right. #although i’d argue that something being completely incompatible with our reality makes it a bad idea#like war as we understand it is inherently a bad idea#and capitalism as it functions in the real world is inherently a bad idea102721,284

ihavereallydumbideasRebloggedanonyymooseFollowhighly recommend: making that character’s mourning WORSE!!!! make them play pretend with that corpse. make it seem like they’re moving on until they start telling the new person to start dyeing their hair the color of the person they lost and start calling them their name to make it clear that they’re hanging out with this person now to try and make them into the old one. make your grieving character put people in the same situation the person they’re mourning died in and have them hope they die to prove it was unpreventable. make your grieving character put people in the same situation the person they’re mourning died in and have them hope they live to prove that it wasn’t doomed to happened. make your grieving characters actively harm the people around them and the memory of the person they lost. I love you morally dubious grieving characters#vertigo#this is genuinely actually the plot of vertigo i’m so serious#i thought it was an intentional false vague post#but no#you did this by accident#but yeah i do agree it is a good idea to do this988,64922,219

ihavereallydumbideasRebloggedhomunculus-argumentFollowI knew english didn't really have an equivalent for "bon appétit", like every other language that I know some of, but I just discovered that they don't have a "bon voyage" either, they just borrow the french one directly. And this is not a french vs english thing either. Swedish, that is a germanic language quite distantly related to english and has no relation to french, still has standardised expressions for both, as does finnish which as fuck-all to do with any of the aforementioned. Every language that I can claim to even roughly understand has some way of expressing "I hope you enjoy your meal" and "I hope you have a good journey" and english is just like "idk idc eat shit and die."kjm126316i can't speak for any english expression for "enjoy your meal," though i'm sure there is one, somewhere, however, english does have an expression for "have a good journey:""farewell."it comes from the old english verb faran, meaning "to go on a long journey" (technically it refers to like. journeying somewhere, but it's implied to be a long one which is what separates it from gan, which means "to go" or "to walk") as was typical of the medieval period, going on a long journey typically involved a measure of uncertainty regarding one's safety, so the expression is literally "fare well," as in, "be well on your journey."over time the semantics within the language shifted enough to where "farewell" is now more synonymous with the japanese "sayonara" (there's a level of finality involved that's otherwise lacking if you just say "bye") but the fact remains that, technically, this is how you say, "have a good journey" in english. (better yet, this is how you say, "have a safe journey" in english.)homunculus-argumentI get where you're coming from and you're not wrong, but I'm stuck imagining how hilariously terrifying it would be if on a plane at the end of the safety announcement, the english version just finished it with "farewell :)" as the plane takes off.ihavereallydumbideasIsn’t bon voyage literally “good voyage”? If so, then we have the phrase “good travels” - it’s not super common, but I’ve heard it plenty, especially when traveling far (like when taking a plane somewhere).#ik you don’t like these arguments but this is kinda exactly the same phrase2021,5874,424

Sponsored

ihavereallydumbideasReblogged softer-uaswinging-stars-from-satellitesFollowALT92670,58953,126

ihavereallydumbideasRebloggeddogpuppyFollowihavereallydumbideas0% language 100% understanding224,2859,732

ihavereallydumbideasReblogged zushiisamesskings-highwayFollowpre-relationship bullshit haikyuu teams probably had to put up with before various ships managed to get their shit togetherdaisuga probably was really annoying with like small/petty jealousy, like a girl would hit on one of them and the other would be standing behind their back making faces about it and mocking it and everyone else on the team just has to put up with it. and then theyre all overly sweet to each other to make up for the petty jealousy or some odd version of "winning them back" after the flirting event and the team is rolling their eyes *so hard*i think asanoya is so annoying bc nobody can convince Asahi that Noya likes him. Like full stop. Eventually someone pulls him aside and is point blank like "Noya said he has a crush on you ask him out" and Asahi is just like: "Haha he was probably joking" and just leaves the scene. Like the absolute refusal to believe it from Asahi combined with Noya's classic teen boy inability to be sincere means that even after theyve both been told they somehow still havent gotten together??? how long is this going to take???tsukkiyama probably ruins everyone's week the week before they get together bc one of them *saw* a confession letter stuck into the other's bag and absolutely went (emotionally) off the rails for the days leading up to them discovering it was for them.I am fully of the camp that iwaoi start dating before they label it/make it official so the whole team is screaming like "PLEASE HAVE A CONVERSATION ABOUT IT" meanwhile Oikawa is saying "we just went on a few dates and kissed a few times it doesnt mean anything" and Iwa is in the background shouting "yeah I dont wanna be anyone's boyfriend that's lame" and then they wander off to go eat dinner together holding hands and the team is left in frustration because ALL they talk about is how theyre *not* in a relationship.for bokuaka its mostly just Bokuto pestering every goddamn person he knows for like 4 months asking "do you think Akaashi likes me?" or "do you think he'd say yes if I asked him out?" and then one day making Konoha *snap* when he says "I need to tell you a secret" and the secret is that he has a crush on Akaashi as if nobody had known thatwith ushiten I imagine Tendou was probably really obvious with his crush/interest but in like a very casual "not taking myself too seriously" kind of way so he's comfortable openly flirting, and Ushijima, against everyone's expectations, doesnt seem to mind the attention but is still who he is, so the whole team just has to put up with the most INSANE interactions. Like Tendou walks into the locker room and cat calls him and Ushijima just replies with a formal "thank you" and Semi is contemplating slamming his head in a locker. There's like 12 months of this. okay okay but I think arankita is *very classic* in that Aran compensates for his crush by over-supporting Kita. so like the whole team gets super annoyed bc Aran wont risk disagreeing with him, is always offering to do extra work, is generally just sucking-up really badly and the twins suffer the most for this bc Aran used to just ignore their antics but now he's super annoyingly on them all the time to try and impress Kitakuroken is a little different. Yaku asks Kuroo every single day if he's asked Kenma out yet. Lev asks Kenma if he has a crush on Kuroo every chance he gets. Fukunaga gives them a wink when they leave practice to walk home together. This is the only pairing in which the team is the irritant pre-relationship and then post-relationship everyone loses interest and moves on. I'd include kagehina but once again the entire goddamn show is everyone putting up with them flirting so whats the point. #how does it feel to be right#esp with ushiten#that one feels like it actually happened in the anime153223,169

ihavereallydumbideasReblogged putcreativenameheredistinguishedbaloneyFolloweilooxaraNon cooking spray stickeilooxaraNon spray stick cooking that-houseNon cooking stick sprayyeahokayillreblogthatyeah okay ill reblog thatautism-official104161,477143,530

ihavereallydumbideasimagine trying to explain daylight saving to aliens. like yeah, we’re gonna lose an hour of sleep today. prepare for it to be dark when we wake up now. how do i know we’re losing an hour of sleep before it happens? the clocks jump forward. yeah. 5 am tomorrow is supposed to be 4 am. yeah no it’s the government’s fault. they make us do this. why? i don’t know man. nobody knows anymore, some people don’t even bother. no the boss will be mad if we show up late. yeah i know it isn’t like… cosmically late, but it is clock late, i’ll still get fired.#like tf do you mean#inspired by it going from sunrise to dark af when i wake up

ihavereallydumbideasReblogged redstonedustelexecutionFollowthey need to invent the opposite of an nda called an fda where u have to tell everyone everything ilovedirtsubpoenavirtualgirladvancetumblrearhartseasealcoholbeltsquidwar thunder forums55,30154,728

ihavereallydumbideasenvironssssssssss part seeven#environs#backyard photography#amatuer photography#photography1